


Recovery

by Jeon_Jungkxxkie97



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mental Institution, Angst, Eating Disorders, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-12 18:09:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12965367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jeon_Jungkxxkie97/pseuds/Jeon_Jungkxxkie97
Summary: Jeon Jungkook gets checked into a mental hospital for treatment. Along the way he meets 6 boys who change his perspective on everything.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted from my tumblr @bts-writes

Jungkook was always quiet. Even as a child he would stray from others, preferring to stay alone in the room or playground. It was chalked up to him being shy and his parents just smiled, dad ruffling Jungkook’s black hair with a chuckle and saying a soft ‘You’ll grow out of it kid. When you get older you’ll have the girls swooning with the pick-up lines.’ But it didn’t work out like that. As time went on Jungkook only reverted into himself more, his parents getting angry that he wasn’t like the others and resorting to using horrible words that no child should ever hear. This dramatically lowered Jungkook’s self-esteem, making his mindset even worse. Like in fifth grade when the boys were playing soccer at recess. Jungkook was considering going over to play when a feeling of dread appeared in his stomach. What if he asked and all the other boys laughed at him? What if he jumped in and was a horrible player? They would all make fun of him. Jungkook decided it was better to stay in the corner and watch from afar.

Or when Jungkook was 16 and at the peak of junior year in High School. Jungkook was the epitome of the perfect student. He did all the work, got top grades in every class and never had an issue with the teachers. He was even considered one of the most attractive guys in school but the social aspect is what ruined him. Normally kids his age would be going to parties or getting girlfriends, or boyfriend's in Jungkook’s case, and getting drunk like stupid kids do. But whenever Jungkook was invited to a party or had someone show any interest that same feeling of panic settled into his stomach, mind filling with thoughts. Now he’s attractive so surely people wouldn’t criticize him, right? ‘But I’m not as handsome as Minho or as tall as Chanyeol so is clearly I can’t be THAT good,’ Jungkook thought. In the end Jungkook stood in the shadows, watching relationships and friendships drift by because of his fears.

Now at the age of 19, Jungkook worked up the courage to go see a Psychologist, although the decision and process was far from easy. It went through a few stages, starting from denial. Surely he didn’t need to see a professional, right? Psychologists are for crazy people and Jungkook isn’t crazy! He probably just has a fear of new people which will go away if he pushes himself a bit.

The next stage was pure fear, so raw and uninhibited that it could be read on his face. It kept Jungkook locked away inside his room, trying to drown out the sounds of his father banging on the door, yelling about how he was useless and a waste of space. How he needed to get some help before he became a freak of nature. Soon enough, Jungkook’s father stumbled away after the drunken spiel, leaving his son curled up on the bed. If he went to a Psychologist then he’d have to speak with them. Jungkook would have to tell a professional all of his problems. But what if the doctor thought he was stupid and over-reacting? Maybe he should think about it some more in the shower.

It was while Jungkook was showering that he finally came to terms with the fact that he needed help. No matter what form it came in. Therapy, Medications or anything else didn’t matter to him as long as it was a treatment. Some people would probably ask why he’s going to see a doctor if he was just scared of that thought and it’s a question Jungkook had finally had an answer to. The answer is simple. This anxiety, this feeling of wanting close relationships but never being able to have them has been ruining his life from the age of 10 years old. He couldn’t take anymore of being reduced to tears because of the smallest criticisms and corrections. It was time to find out what’s going on.

The Psychologist was more helpful than Jungkook would have imagined. Dr. Kim was the most patient person Jungkook had come into contact with in his life. The man didn’t rush Jungkook to speak about the issues he was having, or push him to speak about what could’ve made him feel this way. But when Jungkook was finally comfortable after an hour and a half of sitting quietly in the chair, he began to speak. Once Jungkook opened his mouth, it was like a dam broke open, everything pouring out as tears slowly rolled down his cheeks. He told Dr. Kim about the emotional abuse and hateful words directed at him by his own parents. How his needs were neglected in favor of alcohol and drugs as the years went by.

Jungkook talked about his school years and outside life. How amazing of a student he was but the thought of talking to people made him feel physically and emotionally ill because of the fear that they would laugh at him and call him inferior which already thought he was in the first place. Jungkook spoke about the effect that being criticized has on him and how it makes him break into tears even if the criticism is something as small as being told that he doesn’t look right that day.

After Jungkook finished explaining everything, he took some tissues to blow his nose and wipe the tears that were shining in his dark brown eyes. As soon as Jungkook regained composure Dr. Kim gave him a soft, reassuring smile, telling Jungkook that he has a good idea of what he’s going through. Jungkook nearly cried again as he was diagnosed with something called Avoidant Personality Disorder and also Depression. Finally, there was a name for everything Jungkook had been feeling. He wasn’t weird or crazy at all.

Jungkook asked what the treatment for Avoidant Personality Disorder was, wondering if he had to keep coming back for therapy sessions. However Dr. Kim told him something completely different. He said that because of the severity of Jungkook’s case, he’s recommending an extended stay in Seoul Mental Hospital. The doctor explained how Jungkook would be able to get better, more personalized care with specialized medication as well.

That’s how Jungkook ended up here, standing in front of the beige building with the words ‘Seoul Mental Hospital’ staring back at him. With suitcase in hand, Jungkook walked up the steps and into the building, eyes going to the floor when he noticed other people in the front area, all staring at him while waiting to visit loved ones. In reality they were only looking for a few seconds but for Jungkook it felt like hours. He knew they were all judging him in their minds. It was eating away at him until a boy at the front desk spoke up, his name tag reading ‘Yoo Youngjae, Receptionist.’

“You must be Jeon Jungkook, right? Dr. Kim called to inform us that you would be coming today. Do you have the referral papers?” The receptionist asked, Jungkook placing them carefully onto the desk with a small nod, flinching when 2 other men rushed up to him. “Hey back off you morons.” Jungkook heard the receptionist say to the men in an agitated tone. “You don’t just come charging at someone who is clearly going to be staying here.”

The men sheepishly apologized, taking Jungkook to an examination room. First, one of the men examined Jungkook’s suitcases, taking away his electronics and removing anything that was deemed dangerous. Like drawstrings, shoelaces, long sleeved shirts and belts. Everything else he was thankfully allowed to keep. All his socks, slippers, bedding and pajamas were all intact, along with his other clothes. Next, both men came to Jungkook slowly. “I’m Jackson and this is Mark.” The man who searched his bags said, shooting a smile. “We need you to strip down to your boxers and just put on this medical gown alright? The Psychiatrist is going to come in and examine you both mentally and physically.” He said, placing a gown right next to Jungkook as both men turned around, giving Jungkook privacy. Of course Jungkook was skittish at the moment, being surrounded by two men he didn’t know wasn’t his idea of a fun day. However, the men are nurses so they wouldn’t lie or hurt him. With that thought Jungkook quickly got undressed and put on the gown, hopping back up on the table and muttering a small “I’m done” as the Psychiatrist came inside.

“Awesome! I’m going to take your bags to your room and after Dr. Im is finished examining you, Mark will bring you over.” Jackson said, smiling again at Jungkook. His eyes also lit up when he got a small - albeit hesitant - smile right back as him and Mark left. “5 bucks says the kid will make friends here.” Mark said, looking at Jackson who nodded and shook his hand.

“Hello there Jungkook, I’m Dr. Im,” said a tall woman with warm brown eyes that were full of love and care. “If it’s alright with you I’d just like to start with getting your background.” She exclaimed, handing Jungkook a clipboard with a basic medical sheet on it to fill out. ‘Name: Jeon Jungkook ‘Age: 19’ ‘Date of Birth: September 1st, 1997’ It went on like that for a while, just Jungkook swinging his feet and filling out the papers while the Psychiatrist looked up more details. “Jungkook it says here that you are on your brother’s insurance, correct?” She asked, seeing Jungkook nod once. “Okay we called them and explained the situation you are in. They said they would cover your stay for however long it’s necessary.”

Jungkook let out a sigh of relief, forever thankful that his brother was such a nice person and so was the insurance company. “Now I’m going to give you a general medical examination then explain what goes on during your stay here.’ The Psychiatrist said, giving Jungkook a basic exam and going over his mental state during it, explaining how she read the report from the Psychologist and made up a treatment plan for him.

“So, I’m going to prescribe you an antidepressant known as Citalopram. It’s also a mood stabilizer and will most likely help with your anxiety as well but we will have to see to be sure. You will also be meeting with a therapist on your own and will be doing group therapy 3 times a week with the other patients in your ward.” The doctor explained, Jungkook biting his lip when he heard there will be more people in the ward with him.

“How many more will there be?” Jungkook whispered, eyes pointed at the floor as he picked the loose skin off the side of his fingers, a nervous habit that he never got rid of as a kid. To be honest Jungkook wasn’t sure if he could be here if there were loads of people trying to talk with him every day, attempting to get his attention and be friends with them left and right.

“You’ll be with only 6 other boys, all of them quite close to your age although I suspect you are the youngest. I’m sure that with time you’ll blend right in with them since the 6 are friends.” Dr. Im said. “You’ll be living in Ward B with the other boys and that ward is for patients with moderate personality disorders. Now, I’ll have Mark bring you to your room and we will meet again later.”

Dr. Im left and Jungkook changed back into his regular clothing, consisting of a white T-shirt, blue jeans and a pair of black timberlands, a limited edition pair that his brother bought last Christmas as Jungkook’s one and only present.

After getting dressed he stepped out of the room and follow the man named Mark down multiple hallways, arriving in front of a door that said ‘Ward B’ on top of it. “I think the boys are waiting to meet you. When Jackson walked in with your suitcase they all looked so excited since they don’t get visitors.” Mark said, gently patting Jungkook’s shoulder and after a few more reassurances, Jungkook stepped into the ward quietly, not making a sound so he didn’t draw attention to himself as he stood in the corner and looked around at the living room part.

The first thing he noticed was a shock of mint green hair on the couch farthest away. Upon having a closer look Jungkook saw that the hair was in fact attached to the head of a napping boy, looking peaceful as he slept on the shoulder of another, older looking boy who was reading a book. Across the room were two boys looking out a big window, sitting side by side and holding hands. Judging from the appearance, the two were clearly sharing a rare moment together in the middle of the day, most likely being moved around everywhere doesn’t give them the opportunity to spend a minute of silence together and just hold hands.

Finally there were the two more boys, both looking not much older than Jungkook. They were sitting in opposite chairs, staring at each other without speaking, expressions blank almost as if they were having a mental conversation that only the two of them could hear. Even without words, their connection was obvious. Nobody would be able to look at another person for so long without speaking unless they were truly bound together, both spiritually and mentally.

Suddenly, the oldest looking boy peered up from his book, eyes widening like he was in shock until a smile came on his face. Jungkook watched him whack the boy with green hair who proceeded to curse loudly and snap everyone’s attention, eyes going to Jungkook who shrunk into himself.

“Can I come to you?” The boy asked as he stood up from the couch, knowing from experience that just walking up to a new patient is dangerous for both people involved. “My name is Seokjin, but nobody here uses honorifics even though I’m the oldest so you could just call me Jin.” He said, stepping a bit closer with a warm smile. “We use honorifics, just not with you babe.” The green haired boy said with a snort, giving Jungkook a lazy wave. “I’m Yoongi. I take it you’re the new kid?” The boy asked, Jungkook giving a hesitant nod in reply. “Awesome, it’s nice to have a new face around here. Do you wanna sit and meet everybody?”

Jungkook shook his head and scurried past all the boys, looking for his room and shutting the door when he was inside of it. Although small it was much better then his little shoe box room at home. It actually had the basic necessities like a desk, big window and a bed that visibly looked more comfortable the the one he used to have. The bathroom was nice and simple with a bigger than average shower and bathtub combo.

“Let’s set everything up” Jungkook said to himself, opening his suitcase and folding up his clothing, putting in on the shelves while humming a ballad. Then was the bedding from his other case, a nice set white set with pink and black flowers on the comforter and the pillow cases. His parents always said that it was to feminine for a boy but Jungkook didn’t listen since it was one of the few things he’d bought himself as a present.

After putting his toiletries in the bathroom Jungkook decided to get out of his daytime clothes, instead putting on a pair of gray sweatpants - no drawstrings of course - and a baggy shirt. He sighed at the warmth and sat under his blankets, taking out a journal and marker since they took away the pens and pencils.

_June 1st, 2017: ‘Well Mr. Journal, this is going to be an interesting stay….’_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You need wings to fly, hyung~"

Jungkook must have fallen asleep while writing because the next time he woke up there was a soft orange glow coming through the window. The room was dark, signalling that someone - possibly a staff member - came to check on him and shut off the lights upon seeing him asleep. Getting out from under the warm covers was something Jungkook didn’t want to do but he felt like going back to the common room and seeing if there was a book he could read. 

After putting on a pair of slippers and wrapping his light blanket around himself, Jungkook made his way out of the room, seeing the faintest source of light from the common area. He tiptoed over, peeking around the wall and taking notice of the two boys from earlier, Yoongi and Seokjin if Jungkook’s memory wasn’t failing. The boys were sitting on the furthest couch, a small lamp illuminating the moment that made Jungkook blush.

Jin was seated fully, hand cupping Yoongi’s cheek as they shared a kiss. It was nothing scandalous by any means but to Jungkook it was something new. Since he didn’t go out of the house much, Jungkook wasn’t exposed to scenes like that often and was fascinated at how the two interacted with each other, especially as they pulled back with soft smiles and pink cheeks, fingers lacing together as they glanced over and saw Jungkook. 

“Oh hello! Do you want to come sit with us? There’s no need to be shy.” Jin said with a warm smile, Yoongi pointing to the couch across from them. Jungkook slowly walked over, blanket dragging across the floor until he sat on the couch and curled into a ball, shyly looking between the two of them. “We never got your name by the way. Are you comfortable telling us or are you mute by any chance?” Jin asked curiously.

“I’m not mute,” Jungkook said, playing with the blanket as his voice came out, small yet melodic. “M-My name is Jungkook. You’re Seokjin hyung and...Yoongi hyung?” He asked, nervousness building since he didn’t want to embarrass himself. Luckily, the feeling dissipated when Yoongi nodded, seemingly honored that Jungkook remembered. 

“Wow it’s been forever since we’ve been called hyung. The kids in here need a scolding.” Yoongi snickered, making Jin laugh at the quip. Jungkook watched the interaction with big and curious eyes, head tilting some as he focused. “Is there anything you’re curious about here? Us or the other boys?” Yoongi asked, being patient and waiting for Jungkook to speak.

“Well...when I c-came in earlier there were two boys sitting in those ch-chairs. They weren’t speaking or anything.” Jungkook stuttered, after another minute or two. “Who are they?” He added, peeking at Yoongi and Jin like they were the all knowing gods of Ward B. Well to be honest, they kind of were since the two have been here the longest.

“Oh that was Taehyung and Jimin.” Jin said softly. “They’re the two most serious patients here at the moment. I probably shouldn’t tell you this but oh well. Taehyung has Dissociative Identity Disorder and Jimin has Depersonalization Disorder.” He explained, laughing when he saw Jungkook’s eyes which were looking at Jin like he was speaking gibberish.

“Dissociative Identity Disorder pretty much means that Taehyung has more than one personality. I believe it’s 3 or 4?” Jin asked, looking at Yoongi who nodded as conformation. “Each personality has its own gender, race, age and more. We don’t really know his personality changes until he opens his mouth. Luckily none of the ones we’ve encountered are violent or things of that nature. He won’t tell us what caused this to develop but it’s not easy for the poor kid, that’s why we tend to care for him more.” 

“Jimin is much more complex to put it in simple terms.” Yoongi said, taking over for Jin. “He doesn’t speak much to be honest. When he does he describes it as being numb in a way. Like he doesn’t feel connected with his body and is moving on auto pilot of sorts. Usually he sits in the chair across from Taehyung and they just look at each other, having a silent conversation since both of them sit still for long periods of time because of their issues.” Yoongi explained, taking a drink of tea then offering it to Jungkook. 

The thought of drinking something warm made Jungkook feel fuzzy so he took the cup, drinking a tentative sip and sighing happily at the vanilla taste. “Why are you guys here?” Jungkook asked, placing the tea down as his hands grabbed one of the decorative pillows to play with. “You don’t have to tell me! I was just curious.”

“No no it’s perfectly fine. I’m 26 so I’ve accepted that I have to open up and talk about my problems.” Jin hummed, chin resting on his knees. “I’m a recovering anorexic. Trust me it isn’t easy to come back from where I was almost 6 months ago. I only weighed 95 pounds and was rushed to the hospital where I almost didn’t come back at all. After I woke up they shipped me here for treatment and now I’m at 110 pounds! They want me to at least 130 - 140 but I’m having a hard time now.” Jin said, sighing a bit. “I know it won’t be easy but I’m going to push myself day by day so I can get out of this place soon.” 

Yoongi kissed Jin’s cheek and waved his hand sarcastically. “Hi there, I’m the token pyromaniac.” He said with a bright smile that was clearly fake, making Jungkook giggle behind his hand. “Thanks for laughing at that kid. Well I guess you could say I’m recovering cause I can’t really start fires in a Psychiatric Hospital now can I? All I get is daily therapy where we talk about our feelings. Honestly I’m waiting for someone to make a bonfire and bring marshmallows so we can sing songs.” Yoongi scoffed.

Jungkook was hiding his face, giggling at each word that Yoongi said. The older boy had a sense of humor that made Jungkook feel comfortable enough to open up a little bit. “I’m here for depression and Antisocial Personality Disorder. It means I’m really scared of talking to people basically. But you two make me feel comfortable.” He said, sounding painfully shy and sweet. 

“Sweetie you don’t have to be nervous around us. We’re all just a bunch of dorks.” Jin laughed, the sound loud enough to make a door open down the hall, a slightly taller boy shuffling into the room with a cup of water and a wicked side eye glare directed at Seokjin. 

“Honestly can’t you be quiet? It’s 9pm and some of us are trying to sleep.” The other boy grumbled, plopping on the couch and making Jungkook let out a soft ‘Oof’, catching the others attention if the way his face morphed into panic was any indication. Luckily the boy closed his eyes, doing some deep breathing and opening them a few moments later. “Hello, I’m Hoseok.” He whispered.

“J-Jungkook. Nice to meet you.” Jungkook whispered back, eyes glued to the floor again. “I’m 20. Are you my hyung too?.” He asked, trying to figure out if he was the youngest of everyone. Hoseok’s face lit up and he clapped his hands when he heard Jungkook’s age.

“Oh you’re the new baby of the group! Taehyung will be excited to hear he isn’t the youngest and can escape Jin being mother hen over him all the time.” Hoseok said, sitting back on the couch and drinking his water, choking when Jin flicked paper at the cup and it landed perfectly. 

“Taehyung LOVES it when I baby him you slice of untoasted bread.” Jin said, the insult making Yoongi and Jungkook laugh as Hoseok looked like Jin had just insulted his entire family. Soon enough the two boys calmed down, wiping their eyes until Hoseok flicked water at Jin’s face, making the laughter start again.

“I am perfectly toasted for your information, Kim Seokjin. The same can’t be said for you with your windshield wiper laughing ass.” Hoseok said, nose high in the air until Jin squinted at him, getting a bottle of water from behind the couch. “Oh you really wanna start this? I’ll have you know that I’m undefeated.” Hoseok growled, Yoongi quickly taking Jungkook to the rooms. 

“Get inside, kid. Trust me it gets ugly out there with the water fights between those two.” Yoongi said, stopping in front of Jungkook’s room. “Actually, how about we hang out together for a while in your room? I saw some sketchpads when Jackson brought your stuff in earlier and wanted to admire the drawings up close. You make art with pens and pencil but I make art with music.” 

Jungkook’s eyes practically had stars in them. Ever since he was little there was a fascination with music inside of him. It didn’t matter if he was hearing a beat, listening to a beautiful voice or even hearing someone rap. Anytime music hit his ears the day seemed to brighten up even if just for a split second. Jungkook practically dragged Yoongi inside, carefully shutting the door behind them. 

“These sheets are really nice. You got any extras?” Yoongi joked, taking a seat on them as Jungkook grabbed his sketchbooks and sat in the chair, passing them to the older boy who looked through them. “Holy shit these are like….really amazing, Jungkook. You could be an artist.” He muttered, a soft blush coming up on Jungkook’s cheeks. 

“I actually wanted to be an artist. I’ve been drawing since I was a baby and won some awards in school when I went.” Jungkook explained, clearing his throat and building himself up to actually ask a question “Can you tell me what you want to do when you leave this place?” He asked, eyes wide and curious.

“I think I’d like to be a musician or a rapper. I always had this dream about traveling the world with all the other boys, starting a band and becoming famous.” Yoongi said, a small smile on his face. “But a dream is all that will ever be. Who knows, we might never get out of this place for all I know.”

“But you can’t give up on it.” Jungkook said, more like whispered since this is the most he’s spoken to a person in years. “I mean, if you say it will never be anything more than a dream then of course it won’t. But if you say ‘One day we’re all going to travel the world as a band’, it’ll give you the drive to keep on going and eventually get out of here. Everyone has hopes and dreams, Yoongi hyung.” Jungkook said, looking away when Yoongi asked if he had a hope or dream besides being an artist. 

“Well, it’s always been a secret but I really want to sing and dance in front of a big crowd one day if I had the courage. Just hearing all the cheers and people supporting me would be the most amazing thing.” Jungkook admitted softly, the thought making him smile. “Who knows hyung, maybe you and I could be in a band together.” He said, a bit surprised when Yoongi held his hand out. 

“It’s a promise then.” Yoongi said, shaking Jungkook’s hand. “You know, I never really had the passion to get better and leave this place, Jin resigned himself to the fact that this is our life now even though the two of us are in love. But now I have to get better.” He added with a smile when Jungkook tilted his head and asked why. 

“Because we made a promise of course.” Yoongi said, carefully placing his arm around Jungkook’s shoulder, keeping still just in case the younger wanted to pull away. Instead Jungkook leaned in slightly, finding that he was starved for the affection he hasn’t had before.

The two boys kept silent, just looking out the window at the sunset through the field of flowers, The sound of Jin and Hoseok’s laughter ringing down the hallway. “You see the sky, kid? One day all 7 of are are going to fly up there. Probably by plane since we don’t have wings.” Yoongi said with a laugh, listening when Jungkook spoke up softly.

“But hyung we need wings to make it up there. After all, wings are made to fly.”


End file.
